The Myth of Having It All Together: Why No One Actually Feels Like an Adult

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Have you ever looked around and thought, Am I the only one who has no idea what I'm doing? Spoiler alert: you're not. The truth is, most of us are just winging it—pretending we know what’s going on while secretly Googling things like how to fold a fitted sheet or what is a mortgage, really?

The Great Adulting Illusion 🏡📅 

When we were kids, adulthood seemed like some magical place where you’d have all the answers. We imagined our grown-up selves with a well-organized calendar, a spotless kitchen, and a mysterious ability to understand taxes. Yet, here we are—eating cereal for dinner, avoiding phone calls, and celebrating when we remember to book a dentist appointment on time. 

The idea that anyone truly has it all together is one of the biggest myths of adulthood. Even the people who seem like they do—the ones with meal prep containers and colour-coded planners—probably have a junk drawer full of chaos (or at least an existential crisis hiding behind their morning coffee). 

Imposter Syndrome: The Uninvited Guest 🤯 

Imposter syndrome isn’t just for new jobs or big achievements—it sneaks into everyday life, too. You might feel confident in one area, but the moment you're asked to fix a leaking sink or assemble IKEA furniture, suddenly, you feel like a complete fraud. (Should I know how to do this? Is there an adultier adult around?) 

The thing is, everyone experiences this doubt. That person who seems effortlessly successful? They probably have days where they feel like they have no idea what they’re doing either. The secret no one tells you is that adulthood is just a series of making things up as you go and hoping for the best.

Social Media vs. Reality 📱💭 

Of course, social media makes things worse. Scroll through Instagram, and it looks like everyone else is thriving—launching businesses, running marathons, or baking sourdough from scratch. Meanwhile, you’re just trying to remember if you paid your WiFi bill this month. 

But what we don’t see are the behind-the-scenes struggles: the missed deadlines, the self-doubt, the nights spent overthinking every decision. No one is actually as polished as they appear online, and that’s important to remember when you start comparing yourself. 

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So, What’s the Takeaway? 🎯 

The next time you feel like you should have it all together, remind yourself: that no one really does. Adulthood isn’t about perfection—it’s about doing your best, figuring things out along the way, and knowing that it’s okay to not have all the answers. 

So, if you’re paying your bills (mostly on time), remembering to drink water, and occasionally eating something green, you’re doing just fine. And if all else fails, just remember—YouTube tutorials exist for a reason. 😉

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post! If you found it helpful, I’d be incredibly grateful if you’d consider sharing it with others—it’s a small gesture that means a lot. Thank you for being here!

With gratitude,

Lavinia

Therapist & Life Coach